by LitEroCat
Lol. One small bit. You have a typo in the first paragraph. Threaded should be threaded.
Manatees are among the most lethargic creatures on land or sea. To have one playing like a dolphin is incongruous in the extreme
Poor anonymous. "Threaded should be threaded." Oops. Treaded.
"Having found a bright toy and a playmate, the playful fish chased the neon top and Meg dropped her bottoms." Playful animal or playful mammal. But I agree, no manatee would be as vigorous as in this story. Using a dolphin would be better.
Nonetheless, good for April Fool's Day.
Thanks to you picky people for pointing out my errors that got past Grammatic. I fixed BOTH 'treaded' errors and another y'all missed. Should be online shortly. I guess Al can't tell a Manatee from a Doll-fin either. Extra credit for knowing which book/series used dollfin... ;-))
The general idea behind this piece is a lot of fun. You write very well. I personally wasn't so keen on the way you began with the climax of the story then flashed back. It was kind of confusing. I generally prefer a fairly linear storyline unless alluding to a past event.
hint- The series began in 1968 and is still available and has fan clubs.