by Unsung Muse
The cadence of this story is perfect, pulling you along in a relentless rush. Excellent flipside from the sweet little cherubs of legend. Well done, and good luck in the contest!
Les/Darkniciad
...in a good way. I really enjoyed it. It was chilly and smooth. A pleasure to read.
Very well done! It raised the hairs on the back of my neck at times...Good luck!!
Hauntingly descriptive and rich in imagery. A fine piece of writing. Good luck in the contest.
This isn't my type of story but I gave you a five because it was so well written. It held my attention and that is what stories are suppose to do. I felt like I was reading a medievile novel. Good job of writing.
DG Hear
All attempts to describe the sheer brilliance of this story would be woefully inadequate. I'm not easily impressed and this is beyond impressive. Good luck in the contest!
you write like jackson pollock paints, all spatter & passion ... stunning.
Don't neglect us mere mortals, now; write more.
and very sad - an outpouring of anguish and loss. I liked how you finished the piece. Well done!
Erotic horror is my favorite and I very much enjoyed this story. Good luck!
and dark, and sad... i can't really say that much yet, i guess i have to read it again first... but really liked it... wonderfully written story...
Normally,the occupational hazard editors face is that we get so caught up in dissecting the mechanics of a story that we miss most of the pleasure other readers gain from reading it. That didn’t happen here. I was so engrossed within the first few lines that I relished When-and-Where, and then read it again to see how you pulled off this tour-de-force.
100 just doesn’t make it—we need to “hack” the system so we can vote 1000s.
No, big words don't make a good story ... the talent, skill, style and ability to weave those words into a complex and mesmerizing piece - those are the things that make a good story. Muse, the raw emotion that you are able to evoke in your pieces is absolutely amazing.
I have always enjoyed that you not only arouse the passions but you stretch the mind and challenge the conventions.
Excellent as always Muse.
If I could write like you, I'd never do anything else :)
Beautifully written and finely crafted as always. A stunning piece of work. I stand in awe of your art.
on this site? When you should be making money with your writing. Time for you to win one of these so you can move on to mainstream publication.
:emoticon:
Rich & compelling imagery.
The only thing that I found a bit disruptive to the smooth read was the extensive use of "--" dashes.
I agree with the other commenters: GET THEE TO A PUBLISHER!
*kisses* ~Imp
This story flows like a great river making it’s way towards the sea. It has a poetic sweep that I find attractive, however it is difficult to follow in places and the exact nature of her "religious experience" remains ambiguous. Was it good or bad? You'll have to decide for your self. At the very least it shows that no one is perfect and there may even be hope for the rest of us.